How to Explain Home Education to Relatives Who Do Not Get It
The kettle is on, the term has started, and the questions roll in. Why are your kids not in school. What about exams. What about friends. If you are home educating in the UK, you will face relatives who do not understand. This is The Kitchen Table conversation — real talk, calm scripts, and a reminder you are not alone in choosing a different path.
Home education in the UK is legal and growing. The hardest part is often explaining it to family who do not understand the choice.
Why relatives push back
Family members often react out of fear. They worry your children will miss out, or they assume you are rejecting the education they valued. Some feel judged by your choice, as if sending children to school is being criticised. Others simply do not know the law and believe home education is a fringe option. Remember their reaction is about their perspective, not your ability.
Know your legal ground
In England, Wales, and Scotland it is legal to educate your child at home. Parents must provide a “suitable education” but there is no requirement to follow the national curriculum or sit exams. Local authorities can make enquiries but do not have automatic rights to enter your home. Being clear on the law gives you confidence when explaining your decision.
Keep your explanation simple
You do not owe a full philosophy. A short, calm statement works best. Examples:
- “Home education is legal in the UK. We are providing a suitable education tailored to our children.”
- “We chose this because it fits our family and the way our children learn best.”
- “Our kids are thriving at home and we are confident this is right for them.”
Answering the common questions
What about socialisation
Children learn to socialise in many ways, not just in classrooms. Home educated children meet peers at clubs, groups, libraries, and in the community. Research shows they often interact with a wider age range than in school.
What about exams
GCSEs and A Levels are available to home educated students as private candidates. Many use exam centres, online schools, or tutors when they are ready. Not all children need the same path at the same age. The system allows flexibility.
How will they cope in the real world
The real world is not twenty five children the same age in one room. It is mixed ages, responsibilities, and experiences. Home educated children grow up navigating daily life, work, volunteering, and hobbies alongside their studies.
Scripts that keep conversations calm
- To grandparents: “We value your concern. The law supports home education and the children are doing well. You are welcome to join us for a project day to see.”
- To siblings: “I know school worked for your kids. This path works for ours. Both are valid.”
- To friends: “We are trying something different. If you are curious I can share what our week looks like.”
Tips that help conversations go smoother
- Lead with confidence. If you sound unsure, relatives will push harder.
- Share positives. Mention projects, trips, or progress your children have made.
- Offer evidence if useful. Show Ofsted statistics, research, or local authority guidance.
- Set boundaries. If the conversation gets heated, say “We are confident in our choice. Let us move on.”
Resources you can point to
If relatives want more information, share credible links:
The bottom line
Explaining home education is not about convincing every relative. It is about standing firm, keeping calm, and giving your children the stability they deserve. Over time, results speak louder than debates. Share what you want, protect your boundaries, and know you are not alone. Thousands of families across the UK are making the same choice in 2025.
About the Author
Heather is the founder of Darling Mellow, a UK parenting and home education platform. She combines over a decade of parenting experience with modern digital tools to create real, relatable content for mums.
She’s completed accredited courses in Childhood in the Digital Age and Positive Parenting Strategies to ensure every article blends personal insight with evidence-based information.