SEND, EHCPs and Neurodivergent Kids
The system is slow. You do not have to wait quietly.
Nearly 295,000 people in England are waiting for an autism assessment, 86.8% of them beyond the 13 weeks NHS guidance allows. Councils refused 43,300 EHC needs assessment requests in 2025. Everything here is written from the actual law, checked against primary sources, and built for parents who are done being fobbed off.
Getting assessed, and getting a plan
The waiting lists, the legal shortcuts, and the paperwork that decides it.
NHS Right to Choose for ADHD and Autism
Your legal right to pick a different NHS-funded provider instead of waiting years. Which areas are quietly capping it, and the five catches nobody warns you about.
Read the guide →Free toolEHC Needs Assessment Request Letter
Writes the letter asking your council to assess your child, argued on the statutory test rather than the higher bar they apply. Works if your child is home educated.
Open the tool →GuideThe EHCP Process, Explained
Every stage from request to final plan, the deadlines the council has to meet, and what to do when they miss them.
Read the guide →£39The EHC Assessment Refusal Appeal Pack
Refused? Your deadline, the six reasons councils give and what is wrong with each, form SEND35A, and model grounds of appeal. 99% of decided appeals go the parent's way.
See the pack →Home educating with SEND
You can. Here is the law, and what actually works day to day.
Home Educating With SEND or an EHCP
What the law actually says about home educating a child with SEND, and what the council can and cannot ask of you.
Read the guide →How toDeregistering With SEND or an EHCP
The special-school exception, the letter, and the bits that catch families out when there is a plan in place.
Read the guide →AutismHome Educating an Autistic Child
The law, deregistering, and making a day that actually works rather than a school timetable at the kitchen table.
Read the guide →ADHDHome Educating a Child With ADHD
Why the usual advice fails, what to do instead, and how to keep the days moving without a fight.
Read the guide →DyslexiaHome Educating a Child With Dyslexia
Practical, evidence-based approaches, and what support you can still access once you have left school.
Read the guide →EBSAThe Anxious Child, and School Avoidance
When school has stopped being possible: the law, the language to use with the council, and how to start recovering.
Read the guide →Support, money and what is changing
The free help, and the policy that affects you.
Free SEND Resources Worth Knowing
The genuinely useful free support, from statutory services to the charities that answer the phone.
See the list →PolicyThe SEND White Paper 2026
What the government is proposing, what it would mean for your family, and what is still undecided.
Read the analysis →GuideGoing Back to School Afterwards
If home ed was a season rather than forever, here is how returning actually works with SEND in the picture.
Read the guide →GentleA Tech-Free Home, Realistically
Screens in a neurodivergent house, without the guilt or the impossible rules.
Read the guide →Free expert help, before you spend anything
Nothing here is legal advice. If you want someone in your corner who knows this system inside out and charges nothing, start with SENDIASS, which is statutory and free in every local authority area, and IPSEA, who run free advice lines and detailed guidance at ipsea.org.uk. Use them alongside anything you read here. If money is tight, use them first.
What your council actually does
In 2025, councils in England refused 29% of the EHC needs assessment requests they decided, and only 45.5% of all plans were issued inside the legal 20 weeks. Both vary enormously by area. See the refusal rate and waiting time for every council, or go straight to your own council.
- What the tribunal data says about appealing: 99% of decided SEND appeals go the parent’s way.
How common is this where you live?
176,361 children in England missed half of school or more in 2024/25, up from 120,000 in 2021/22, even as overall absence improved. See the figures for your council.
If your child cannot attend school, the council still has a duty
Under section 19 of the Education Act 1996 your council must arrange suitable education for a child who cannot attend because of illness, exclusion or any other reason, including mental health. What the duty covers, and when the clock starts.
This is information, not legal advice
Darling Mellow is a parenting website. We are not solicitors, we are not regulated to give legal advice, and nothing here is advice about your particular child or situation. We write about the law in England, we date everything and we link our sources so you can check them. Deadlines and duties change, and only you know your full circumstances, so please take proper advice before making a decision that matters.
Where to get free or regulated advice
- Your local SENDIASS. Free, confidential and impartial, and every council in England must provide one. Find yours through your council’s SEND Local Offer, or via GOV.UK.
- IPSEA. A charity with legally trained advisers, giving free advice on SEND law in England. Their guidance is the best free legal explanation available.
- Legal aid, through Civil Legal Advice on 0345 345 4345 (Monday to Friday 9am to 8pm, Saturday 9am to 12.30pm). Special educational needs is one of the areas still covered. Legal aid can fund advice and help preparing a SEND Tribunal appeal, though not representation at the hearing itself. Check whether you qualify with the official legal aid checker.
- A solicitor regulated by the Solicitors Regulation Authority. Find an education law specialist through the Law Society’s Find a Solicitor, and you can confirm anyone is genuinely regulated on the SRA register.
If you are in Wales, Scotland or Northern Ireland, the law and the services differ and you should use your own nation’s guidance.